Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamour and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.
(Ephesians 4.29—5.2, ESV)
In 2015 a stretch of the newly resurfaced A303 in Wiltshire had to be replaced. The problem was invisible to the naked eye, but fundamental: the resurfacing had used poor quality stone which couldn’t withstand the weight of traffic. And so the roadworks began all over again!
In today’s passage the apostle Paul continues the building analogy he developed back in Ephesians 2. If we are now the new ‘temple’, the place where God dwells, what sort of stones do we need to build it? What will ensure a strong and stable structure, somewhere fit for the Lord for the long-term?
What Paul contrasts are the good quality stones versus the bad – those which might not look too different on the surface, but which won’t stand the weight of the job.
The good ones are scattered throughout our verses: encouraging talk (Ephesians 4.29), kindness and compassion (Ephesians 4.32), self-giving love (Ephesians 5.2). We can really build others up with these! They are how Jesus lived, and so they form the model for us too – we try to live like this ‘just as Christ loved us’. His example becomes ours.
On the other hand, we also get some bad bricks to avoid: dirty talk (Ephesians 4.29), bitterness, rage, slander and malice (Ephesians 4.31). If we’re honest, we’ll all feel the temptation towards these from time to time. People let us down, or treat us unfairly and we want to get them back. It’s natural – but it’s not supernatural. It’s not the life God has called us to. In fact, Paul goes further and says that these are things which ‘grieve the Holy Spirit’ (Ephesians 4.30).
It’s worth spending a moment unpacking that challenging phrase. The sort of image Paul is constructing here is not that of a temperamental diva liable to take offence at the slightest of slights. Nor is it the permanently disappointed manager for whom nothing is ever good enough. Rather, it is the loving parent who feels genuine sadness when we let ourselves down – but who never stops loving us, can’t wait to forgive us, and who is always quick to see the best in us. In short, our biggest supporter.
It reminds us that the Spirit’s presence in our lives isn’t an impersonal force but a close friend, with deep feelings for us. We are God’s dearly loved children (Ephesians 5.1), and God is always cheering us on from the sidelines. It may be that there are some negative feelings which we need to let go of at present – take a moment to offer these back to your biggest supporter. And, positively, may God’s unconditional love inspire us today to build our lives – and the lives of others – with life-giving stones.
Heavenly Father, thank you that, in Christ, I am being built, together with other believers, into your dwelling place! I am full of awe that you count me as your child and that Jesus calls me his friend. Help me Lord to imitate you, walking in love as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us. May your Holy Spirit be at work in me, transforming me into a person whose every word and action honours you, builds others up and speaks of your gift of grace to everyone who sees and hears.
These Pentecost reflections were written by Revd Matt Trendall, a minister working in Milton Keynes. Check out his blog at www.dailyinspiration.org.uk.
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